Spongebob: Cheer up, Squidward! It could be worse.
Patrick: Yeah, you could be bald and have a big nose.
Squidward: Why must every eleven minutes of my life be filled with misery?
Spongebob: You know, life is like a bucket of wood shavings, except when they're in a pail. Then it's like a pail of wood shavings.

Patrick: You said bye Squidward twice.
Spongebob: ...I like Squidward .
Patrick: It may be stupid, but it's also dumb.
Sandy Cheeks: I love karate.
SpongeBob : I love kara-te.
Mr. Krabs: I love money-e.
Squidward: I hate all of you.
Patrick: I wumbo, you wumbo, he she we wumbo, wumboing, wumbology, they study of wumbo...come on Spongebob, this is first grade !
SpongeBob : I love kara-te.
Mr. Krabs: I love money-e.
Squidward: I hate all of you.
Patrick: I wumbo, you wumbo, he she we wumbo, wumboing, wumbology, they study of wumbo...come on Spongebob, this is first grade !
Spongebob: Psst, Squidward, I’m working in the kitchen... at night! hey Squidward, guess what? I’m chopping lettuce... at night. OW!!! I burned my hand... at night!
Squidward: One-hundred and one dollars for a Krabby Patty ?
Mr. Krabs: With cheese, Mr. Squidward. With cheese.
Patrick: Never mind the car, where's the road, road, road, road, road, roa... sorry.
Spongebob: Eew, I think I stepped in something.
Plankton: Not in something, on someone, you twit!
Spongebob: GARY, YOU ARE GOING TO FINISH YOUR DESERT AND YOU ARE GONNA LIKE IT!
Squidward: Spongebob, no matter what I've said, I've always sortof liked you.
Spongebob: Squidward, I used your clarinet to unclog my toilet.
Squidward: And the walls will ooze green slime! Oh, wait, they always do that.
Squidward: Next, I suppose you'll want me to go square-dancing with Patrick.
Patrick: I invented something! It's a stick that you can draw or write stuff with.
Spongebob: That's a pencil, Patrick. It's already been invented.
Patrick: Ooh! This time I really have something. A glass ball that lights up so you can see in the dark.
Spongebob: That's a light bulb, Patrick. It's already been invented.
Patrick: This is a good one! I've invented a parallel dimension.
Spongebob: That's a mirror, Patrick. It's already been invented.
Patrick: Someone keeps stealing my ideas!
Spongebob: [In mirror, speaking with German accent] Well, I thought it was a pretty good idea.
Squidward: Spongebob ! You buffoon !
Spongebob: Squidward, everyone knows I’m a sponge. I look nothing like a balloon.
Spongebob: Patrick! Stop eating Squidward!
Patrick: [After the Big One eats his board] Hey, I was gonna eat that!
Plankton: People around here wouldn't know a good meal if it walked up to them, looked them in the eye and said "Hello, I'm a delicious meal. Glad to meet ya! Why don't you buy me and keep Plankton from losing everything he's worked for his entire life?"
Karen: If a customer did order one of your meals, it would look him in the eye.
Squidward: If I had a dollar for every brain you don't have, I'd have one dollar.
Spongebob: Excuse me, sir? You're sitting on my face, which is also my body.
Mr. Robot Krabs: Ravioli, Ravioli, Give me the formuoli!
Patrick: I can’t hear you ! It’s too dark in here !
Sandy: There ain't nothing you can do to stop me.
Spongebob: Oh yeah? What if I said YARGASHMARGLEF?!
Sandy: I have to admit, that slowed me down.
Squidley: Oh, Dark Knight, spare us please. Don’t cut off our heads and boil our knees. Take these two and let me go free, and I will give thee some… cheese.
Mr. Krabs: With cheese, Mr. Squidward. With cheese.
Patrick: Never mind the car, where's the road, road, road, road, road, roa... sorry.
Spongebob: Eew, I think I stepped in something.
Plankton: Not in something, on someone, you twit!
Spongebob: GARY, YOU ARE GOING TO FINISH YOUR DESERT AND YOU ARE GONNA LIKE IT!
Squidward: Spongebob, no matter what I've said, I've always sortof liked you.
Spongebob: Squidward, I used your clarinet to unclog my toilet.
Squidward: And the walls will ooze green slime! Oh, wait, they always do that.
Squidward: Next, I suppose you'll want me to go square-dancing with Patrick.
Patrick: I invented something! It's a stick that you can draw or write stuff with.
Spongebob: That's a pencil, Patrick. It's already been invented.
Patrick: Ooh! This time I really have something. A glass ball that lights up so you can see in the dark.
Spongebob: That's a light bulb, Patrick. It's already been invented.
Patrick: This is a good one! I've invented a parallel dimension.
Spongebob: That's a mirror, Patrick. It's already been invented.
Patrick: Someone keeps stealing my ideas!
Spongebob: [In mirror, speaking with German accent] Well, I thought it was a pretty good idea.
Squidward: Spongebob ! You buffoon !
Spongebob: Squidward, everyone knows I’m a sponge. I look nothing like a balloon.
Spongebob: Patrick! Stop eating Squidward!
Patrick: [After the Big One eats his board] Hey, I was gonna eat that!
Plankton: People around here wouldn't know a good meal if it walked up to them, looked them in the eye and said "Hello, I'm a delicious meal. Glad to meet ya! Why don't you buy me and keep Plankton from losing everything he's worked for his entire life?"
Karen: If a customer did order one of your meals, it would look him in the eye.
Squidward: If I had a dollar for every brain you don't have, I'd have one dollar.
Spongebob: Excuse me, sir? You're sitting on my face, which is also my body.
Mr. Robot Krabs: Ravioli, Ravioli, Give me the formuoli!
Patrick: I can’t hear you ! It’s too dark in here !
Sandy: There ain't nothing you can do to stop me.
Spongebob: Oh yeah? What if I said YARGASHMARGLEF?!
Sandy: I have to admit, that slowed me down.
Squidward: Why are you crying? I told you I made up the story.
Spongebob: That’s not why I’m crying. I'm just so proud that you would go on the whole other side of the street and dress up as the Hash-Slinging Slasher just to entertain me. You must really love me.
Squidward: There’s only two problems with that.
Spongebob: What?
Squidward: First of all, I hate you, and second..How can that be me when I’m standing right here?
Spongebob: That’s not why I’m crying. I'm just so proud that you would go on the whole other side of the street and dress up as the Hash-Slinging Slasher just to entertain me. You must really love me.
Squidward: There’s only two problems with that.
Spongebob: What?
Squidward: First of all, I hate you, and second..How can that be me when I’m standing right here?